Saying Goodbye to My Fur-Brother: Gizmo “Old Man”


By, Crystal S. Kauffman, Staff Writer

 

Tomorrow, I will be saying goodbye to my “Old Man”.  Gizmo was my Fur-Brother for over 15 years or more. He has been with my family for his whole life, but due to moving and new landlord issues. I had to make a heart breaking decision to re-home him immediately or surrender him to the animal shelter down town. I believe that I have found the best home for him and he will be able to live his life with a family, instead of living in a cage the rest of his life.

I am so happy to have I met his new pet parent by phone today and I told her all about him. I really am excited for him to start a new life, but it is a bittersweet emotion I am feeling tonight. He is a loyal, sweet, and fun dog to love or adore as much as I do. My family adored him as well, because of his laid back personality. He loves playing with cats and other dogs around his size.

Gizmo’s Journey So Far

I have always been his “Sissy”, since the day that he was born to my momma’s Poodle and her Chihuahua mix. He was my granddad’s puppy/dog for many years, until he passed away. Then, my mother claimed him and cared for him. I moved in with my mom six years ago to help her out, but unfortunately both mine and her situation has changed. Recently, mom was placed in a nursing home for health reasons.

Additionally, my husband and I moved as well, but now we have Gizmo with us fulltime. He loves it but my landlord doesn’t. Thankfully, I was given time to find him a very good home. I did my screening and I know that he will adjust well to his new companion. Gizmo and I have a very strong family bond, which will make this a very hard step for me to make. Pray for me that Gizmo, my momma, and I will both have the strength to adjust from this change in our lives.

I have so many memories with him, but he has over the last few years he has become partly deaf and partly blind. However, throughout these changes, he has literally stayed right by me and my husband. I will miss him so much every day, but I know deep in my heart that he is getting a new pet parent that will love him as much as my family has. Thank you for the prayers people has sent out on his behalf, in order to guide meto the best home for him.

I will keep in contact with his new pet parent, until he crosses the rainbow bridge.

To Gizmo: Sissy loves you always and you truly hung the moon. Thanks for the sweet and special memories that we have shared.

Sorry to be so emotional

Thank you stopping by,

©2016, Crystal S. Kauffman

nothing impossible God

©Unknown

Diabetic Sponsor Needed Desperately


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I love my doctor, but I need a Diabetes Sponsor! I need someone who takes insulin regularly. I need someone who has more experience, than I do on this matter. I want to change my life, but I am disabled and I live on a very tight budget. I need education, support, understanding, and most of all someone who can help me learn how to truly manage my diabetes Type 2. I am looking to do this privately and not have my business spread all over internet, so please don’t contact unless you are totally sincere in helping me.

I have made a lot of changes, but they are not enough. I appreciate your help, whoever you may be. Also, I am not rich, so please be aware I cannot make recipes that I see on internet at this time. I have changed my portion sizes, but I get my A1C numbers down and then they go up again. I help others a lot with support for cancer but now I am reaching out for help with this health issue. I survived cancer 11 years ago and I KNOW that I can beat this.

So, with that said, I look forward to learning what you know.

Email me at laughatcancer@gmail.com

PS: I am also checking out diabetic websites, but once we talk I will explain my food limitations.

Little Sis…


My Twin and I

Matthew and Charity are fraternal twins, which were born to proud parents Joshua and Melody Wishman on Sept 17th. The gleaming parents were only expecting one child, but eight minutes after Matthew was born. The doctor announced that she was having another baby, which was a beautiful baby girl. Both parents were doubly surprised at the second child’s birth, because they only planned for one child. The proud grandparents seen the babies and offered to go buy what the couple needed for the surprise delivery.

They share everything as they grew up, but sometimes they argued a lot and fought over things they didn’t want to share. As they grew into young children, both of the twins began trying to create their own identity. For years the parents heard the twins squabbling about not wanting to share a birthday anymore.  So, their parents let Matthew have the actual birthday and Charity got to pick her own date. She chose Oct. 28th , and finally the twins stopped squabbling about sharing birthdays and became best of friends.

Charity was about five years old when she began collecting rocks and animals of all kinds, even the slimy yet icky ones. Her mom cringes every time she brings a new animal that she has found. When she was twelve years old, Charity had caught non-venomous snakes and different types of lizards. Matthew thought his sister was also weird, because she is always catching some kind of wild animal every day…even bugs!

Matthew didn’t say anything, but he knew she was the coolest little sister that anyone could have. He was surprised that she started began researching the animals around her area at seven years old, in order to learn more about the wildlife that she enjoys catching. Matthew was shocked when she began explaining that some wildlife was called venomous and some are called non-venomous animals.

Charity had no fear of wildlife, which privately Matthew and his parents worried about her getting bitten by a venomous animal. She told Matthew that when she gets older that she will work with wildlife. Matthew gave Charity a camera for her 14th , birthday, so she can take pictures of the wildlife instead of catching them. However, she still caught animals and photographed them and then brought them home anyway.

Today, she came in will a huge bullfrog and she began begging her mom, “Can I keep it?”

Her mother said, “No, the bullfrog has a family that misses him, just as I would miss you if you just disappeared. So, take him back to where you found him, so he can find his family and you come back right away for supper.”

Charity nods and returns the bullfrog to his home at the pond, where she found him at. At first the frog, just sat there and seemed shocked to Charity. She picked him up and hugged him to say goodbye to her bullfrog. Immediately, he jumped out her arms and she left a few tears out, as she watched him disappear. She heard someone walking up behind her and she wiped her tears away and turned to see Matthew.

“I’m sorry Sis. I know that…” Matthew said.

Charity cut him off, “You are not sorry, because you hate the things I catch.”

“What? I don’t like what you catch, but I do think it is awesome that you are brave enough to catch whatever animals you find. I bought you the camera, so you can take pictures to remember all the animal friends you have met. Plus, you’re my best friend and I don’t like when you are sad for any reason.” Matthew explained.

“Really…I didn’t know you felt that way. By the way, your only eight minutes older than me.” Charity replied.

They hugged and began heading home, but all of a sudden Charity bolts to the bushes next to the pond. She pops out of the bushes with a turtle and she gave her brother an extensive education about the turtle she was holding. He giggled to himself, because she looked so excited while talking about the turtle. However, her mood changed when she put the turtle back in the bushes.

“You really should find a way to work with wildlife, because you obviously know a lot about all types of nature’s animals. You light up when you are talking about wildlife and how they live, what they eat, and other neat facts about the animals.” Matthew said.

“Maybe, I could volunteer at the local zoo?” Charity answered.

They headed home and washed up for supper, yet Charity was so excited for some reason, but her mom had no idea what she was excited about. They settled down to supper and finally their mom had to inquire about the secret between Matthew and Charity.

She asked both of them, “What is the secret that you two have.… Spill it?”

“I want to volunteer somewhere where I can work with wildlife.” Charity declared.

Well, if you stop bringing your friends home, I will help you find a good place for you to be a volunteer.”

“Deal….Thanks mom!” Charity agreed.

Later, Matthew search on the internet for different places, which can volunteer at and he wrote their information down. Charity was surprised when he handed her the list of wildlife sanctuary’s to call tomorrow.

“Thanks…I am surprised you did this for me.”Charity said.

“I will do anything for my courageous, yet weird little sister!” Matthew replied.

©2008, Crystal S. Kauffman

Diagnosed with a Severe UTI


Kurinary_tract

Has anyone else experienced this? For months, I have been having issues my bladder. Unfortunately, my bladder always hurt from the cancer treatment 11 years ago. Plus, it is overactive and doesn’t empty well. SO, I am always running to the bathroom.

 I went to my regular doctor on 8/5 and she gave me some antibiotics. After running test she confirmed that I had an UTI.  Once, I had completed those antibiotics, I still felt like something was wrong. My back near my kidneys heart and my bladder hurt really bad, especially when I went to bathroomI

Yesterday, I starting peeing blood and a lot of it. with blood clots. By the way, aggressive cervical cancer treatment took away my menstrual, so I knew that I wasn’t just having monthly visitor. Immediately, I called my Aunt Donna and she advised calling the doctor, so I called and was told to go the ER. Well now, I am on another set of antibiotics and I truly hope this time it helps. Well, the ER doctor acted like it was no big deal, he even said it was common. I was stunned, but I made it through and I am still hurting a lot. I am so blessed it was not something life-threatening. 

I would love to hear your story or suggestions that may help me keep these UTI’s at bay.? Next stop…Urologist I hope!

Copyright 2014, Crystal S. Kauffman

Eyes Like Me


My twin brother and I after learning I had cervical cancer in 2002. He would not let me cry!

My twin brother and I after learning I had cervical cancer in 2002. He would not let me cry!

Staring at an image of your face,
My brother was born in first place.
Looking at the image of me,
It is my twin brother I see.

Eyes with the same shape as mine,
My brother is the only link to a time.
Mistakes we both have made,
Built up hate and anger replaces the pain.

A bond broken many years ago,
Now, it is hard to let our love show.
Getting past the way we feel,
Is this the only way our bond can heal?

Help me try to turn the page,
Let us start acting our age.
Adults with responsibilities of our own,
I need my friend, I lost for so long!

©Crystal S. Kauffman, 2001

Missing You Grandpa Amon


Grandpa Ray L. Amon

Grandpa Ray L. Amon

Grandpa’s Sweetheart

As a young girl, I met my Grandpa on my dad’s side of the family. For those of you who don’t know Ray C. Amon adopted me and my two brothers, as his legal children when he signed our birth certificates. So, legally he is our father and I reconnected with him about ten or more years ago. During that time, I always asked about my grandparents and I learned a few months back that my Grandpa Ray L. Amon had cancer.

As I first talked to him recently, I began to remember his voice from when I was a young girl and we were living with my dad and mom in Jacksonville, FL. Anyway, I remembered that he came to visit us and I vaguely remember what he looked like then. However, I remembered his voice when he spoke on the phone. He always called me “Grandpa’s Sweetheart”, which he called me again when I spoke to him recently on the phone.

When he became sick, I got sad because I wanted to see him before he passed away. Unfortunately, I was unable to visit him and he went to be with the Lord, but I know he will be watching over me. I hope he gets to meet my other family members and loved one that have already went to rest in the Lord. When I spoke with him, his voice sounded excited and he said, “Hello sweetheart!”  I haven’t heard his voice or him say this to me, him since I was a very young girl.

It felt so good to reconnect with him, but I wish I could have seen him and hugged him before he passed away. However, during the conversation we had; he said that, “He was proud of me and he would see me on the other side.” I knew he loved me throughout the years we were apart and I knew he missed me as well. I just wanted to let him know that I love him and will miss his voice so much, but I am glad he is with the Lord.

Thanks to my dad for letting my grandpa and I reconnect with each other, because it meant a lot to me to hear his voice again. I love you and I am sorry for your loss as well. Thank you to my sister Melba for the picture and I am sorry for yours and Amanda’s loss of a sweet man. 

 

 

Night Dreams


ImageYou been gone for so long, but I always thought you were happy with your choice. So, I walked away to keep from being crushed every day, by the reminder that I will never be with you again. I lost my best friend and my lover, but you thought I was too young and too wild. Yesterday is just a memory, yet every night I feel your invisible touch.

My life has changed in many ways, by having two more beautiful children and getting married twice. I thought I was over you, until the moment you wrapped your arms around me the other night. I felt complete at that moment, even if it was for just for second. My love for you has never died, even though I tried to move on and forget how I much I adored you.

You constantly invade my dreams and I wake up feeling complete, until I realize you are not there once again. So many years has passed, but you can see how I feel the moment you look into my eyes. What hurts is I was so close to being with you forever, but somehow I messed up as I generally do. In my dreams, you are with me and we are happy together walking the beach at night like we did on my birthday.

You actually tell me that “You love me”, even though you said you would never say that again to any other woman. My dreams are amazing but they never come true, because I am not with you. I turned to everything to ease the pain and to keep me from feeling so lost. Nothing ever dulled the pain, instead I would just cry for you more.

I wonder if I ever cross you mind or enter your dreams, especially when you are alone. Sometime dreams can be realistic, but they always seem to end and the pain begins again. I remember everything about you like your smile and how you moved the night we made love.

I felt like I was your princess and I knew you was sincere with each touch. I will never forget you and I hope that you have not forgotten me. A heart does not forget the first kiss, as we lay together in the back of your white van. Each kiss felt like electricity thundering throughout my body and I wanted more. You held me so close next to you and we spent the night just kissing and talking about our dreams.

I never wanted to leave your arms and I didn’t want to leave your side. I guess something must have broken, because you did leave my side and shattered my heart. Nothing ever stopped the way I feel, not the whiskey or the tears. However, the pain stayed and nothing ever stopped the desire to find you. I want to lay with you forever, like we do in my nightly dreams.

I am standing right in front of you and I wonder if you have the same feelings that I have for you. Age is just a number, but love is blind and I have loved you for over twenty years. I want to reach out and hold you, but I can’t seem to bring myself to do it. No matter what, I will always look for you in my dreams where I can show what my heart truly feels for you.

I have to let you know how I have felt all these years about you and your love you gave to me. I am older now and I have changed in my ways from learning to write and going through college and cancer treatment. Before I leave this world, I just want you to know what is hidden inside my heart. We don’t need to talk about it, but you are the light of my dreams and my heart.

By, Crystal S. Kauffman

© 2013